Sunday, July 19, 2009

Getting what you need

When we got back from a month on the road I was burned out. I was fried. I was toast. I was fried toast with a side of exhaustion and a liberal sprinkling of totally done. I had no reserve. I was running on fumes.

Like I said, I was burned out.

And then my little sister packed up and left town 4 days after I got home. And one of my best friends David Lazaroff, left a couple of days later.

And suddenly I was fried toast with a side of exhaustion and a liberal sprinkling of totally done with a side salad of sadness.

That is a menu you just don't want to be.

Before the burnout, in less road weary and more optimistic times, Dave and I had booked a trip to go see his parents a week after we got back from our month away. It had seemed like a good idea at the time.

But a week after we got home, I was a numb ball of tired numbness, and I *did not* want to leave my house. Not for nothing or no one. It was just starting to hit me that two of my most favorite people in the world had left Austin for good, and that the town I loved would never quite be the same. It made me doubly exhausted when I tried to imagine living without them and how rightfully tired I was from our trip.

I tried to blog about how I felt, but I ended up talking about the heat instead, because in addition to all the tiredness and sadness, it was a zillion degrees outside. You kind of become a prisoner to air conditioned spaces when it's that hot and you have a little bean to look after.

So, let's recap. I was tired, sad, a little lonely and fucking hot.

And then we went to visit Dave's parents.

Which, remember, I was not really looking forward to.

And now, here I sit, in Casper, Wyoming -- a rested, relaxed and decidedly happier Elizabeth than I was a week ago.

We slept. We swam. We took walks on the beaches. We had long leisurely breakfasts, and delicious dinners with multiple family members in attendance. We napped. We talked. We recharged. It was really quite delightful.

So, I'm here to say it loud and proud. I was wrong. Universe, feel free to do the in-your-face dance whenever you want.

4 comments:

Joanna said...

Lovely post.

But...ummm...beaches in Wyoming? Just asking...

Geezerglide said...

So how was the Casper show? Did Mack get the bus into that teeny weeny space by the stage? I was at the fair on Sat but had to leave for hot hot Tucson on Sunday. BUMMER!

MAYBELLINE said...

Recharging is something we all need even if we don't realize it.

Mom of 2 said...

Baby & ASL

I know you are a new mom and I was just wondering if you have ever considered Signing with her? I have 2 kids and it was the best thing I ever did. I was able to communicate with them earlier than I ever could have nearly eliminating the terrible 2's. I learned from a DVD series called signing time. I do not work for the company in any way, I am just a Mom with a passion. It saved my sanity many times.

I remember when my son was about 12 months he cried and cried. and I changed him, I fed him, in desperation I said what is wrong with you. He signed pain. I said what hurts and he pointed to his mouth. A little tylenol and he was a new kid. It paid for itself in that one day.

If you are interested check out www.signingtime.com or on facebook